im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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