I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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