I need help removing her.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
