My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize