You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
you never un-have a 4some
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
