Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
