can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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