Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
