Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
