What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
