why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
