Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
