the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize
