i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
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