They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize
