Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
