It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
