Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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