so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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