Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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