i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize