..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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