Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
My day in three words: secret purse cake
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
