sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
