So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Randomize
