wakey wakey hands off snakey
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
