You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize
