I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
