Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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