tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Randomize
