god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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