She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
