it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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