I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
