Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize