i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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