So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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