Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
