After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
We don't watch enough power rangers
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize