I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Randomize
