My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
