I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
