If i could tip my vagina, i would.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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