Where did you get a picture of my penis
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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