Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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