I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Randomize
