Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
bring money and cleavage
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
