dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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