dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Small penises have feelings too.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Randomize
