Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
he puts the penis in happiness.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Randomize
